The Traitors on Peacock — **👈🏾 Glenn and I are obsessed with this TV Show… 👀👀🔍**

Legit. Obsessed. aka we binge watch it. 📺

It's so fascinating. 🤩

20 strangers come together at a beautiful secluded mansion in Scotland, Australia, or New Zealand, all with the sole goal of earning a large cash prize. 🤑

A few hours after being introduced, three people are chosen out of the twenty to become traitors. 😈

The traitors' objective is make it to the very end of the game undetected and keep the all cash for themselves.

How do they stay undetected?

By lying, of course!

And “murdering” off the non-traitors, or Faithfuls, as they're called in the show.

Traitors and Faithfuls alike earn the cash by doing crazy, athletic, and sometimes skin-crawling, challenges together. 🪱🐀

But those challenges are a mere distraction—or a source of relief?—from the real game, which is sniffing out the backstabbers. 🗡️

With banishments and “murders," this show is a riveting social experiment! 🔬

One that Glenn and I can't wait to sit down and watch as these 20 people put the traitorous puzzle pieces together.

We scream at the players, hoping they can hear us somehow…

🫣 “No! Don't trust so and so!”

🤔 “Come on! Why aren't they using better logic?”

😱 “Oh my goodness—they're a detective in real life! Why can't they see through this person?!”

It gets my blood pumping and I can start to feel my heart rate rise as I sit through an hour episode. 😰

Inevitably, as the 20 strangers build alliances, feeling are hurt; tears flow; and shock ensues as the traitors gain trust and pick people off, making their way to the end of the game.

A few nights ago, though, I found myself standing up and shouting in victory as one traitor in particular finally got his just desserts!

HALLELUJAH! 🙌🏾

And as I sat back feeling smugly triumphant—yes, I know I'm not actually on the show, and that it could be mildly concerning that I'm this invested in it—I was thinking about why I was so hyped.

And I think it's because there are few life experiences more painful, more devastating than…

UGH. I hate betrayal… 😭

Don't you?

It makes me sick even thinking about it.🤢

And honestly, my heart is beating a little faster even as I type this.

What about you?

When you think of betrayal does someone's face come to mind?

Maybe you're like me and a little pang stabs at your heart, as you remember the time someone utterly stabbed you in the back or threw you under the bus. 🚌

Those phrases are graphic when you really think about them, right?

They highlight the kind of damage betrayal wreaks…

Betrayal doesn't just make you mad.

It doesn't just make you sad.

It breaks your heart. 💔

It completely blindsides you. 🫢

😓 How could they?

😓 I thought they knew me better?

😓 I thought I knew them better!

Betrayal tears our hearts apart because it destroys the reality of the relationship.

We perceived things to be one way, but betrayal reveals that we had it wrong. ❌

It's so awful, isn't it?

And if you're like me after being betrayed, you get in your head about it. You start to doubt not only yourself, but other relationships as well.

UGH. 💔

Betrayal is devastating and betrayal triggers grief.

Being betrayed is a grief event.

Whether it's a spouse whose cheated, a bestie whose used you, a family member who has outed you…

Betrayal destroys relationship.

And usually it's the relationship you lose…

Now, thankfully, the Traitors is just a game.

The participants are still able to maintain relationship with the people who deceived them.

But it's not that easy for the rest of us…

What about you + the “traitor” in your life?

Have you been able to heal and/or maintain a relationship with that person?

Not that you have to, but sometimes we don't have a choice. 🫤

May I lovingly suggest, the best (if not only) + healthiest way to move beyond the betrayal?

You have to grieve it.

You have to grieve the person + the relationship

You have to release them and it as if they were dead.

Because, honestly, it is dead.

The life of that bond in that time and space has expired.

Like so many things in life, what began has come to it's natural conclusion, however painful.

But… if you can grieve it + then forgive—especially if you don't have the luxury of walking away from that person—then who knows?

While the former relationship is dead, it doesn't mean a different and perhaps better one couldn't emerge. 🌱

Ok, I've said a lot really quickly. Let's just take a deep breath for a second.

Before I wrap this blog, let me say this: Forgiveness does not mean condoning what the other person did to you.

I tell my clients this all the time.

Forgiveness doesn't excuse that person's actions toward you. E V E R.

Instead, forgiveness offers you freedom.

Forgiveness allows you to move forward with a heart more intact. ❤️‍🩹

I'm not saying it's easy.

But I am saying, that grieving the loss of the relationship, is the healthiest way to move beyond betrayal + back into your best self.

Look, I could never be on Traitors.

First of all, I could never lie to people that boldly. Second of all, I'd probably have a heart attack while trying. 😵

But I do believe that betrayal presents us with an opportunity. 🤲🏾

Betrayal is a wake-up call to reevaluate our connections, redefine our boundaries, and surround ourselves with those who truly deserve our trust.

If you're reading this and you've recently been betrayed, please know that my heart breaks with yours about what happened. 💔

And I know that the first step toward wholeness is grieving what was lost.

And if you need a safe space where you can do that, please reach out to me.

It would be my honor to move beyond the betrayal and back into your best. 🫂